Nikiah Seeds
Certified Birthing From Within Mentor
Childbirth Educator
CD (DONA), RHN, CH

A Blessingway is a spiritual tradition used to mark any time there is change in a young woman's life. These times can be her first moon time, graduation from school, marriage, or birth.

A birth Blessingway is a special time for a pregnant woman. Sometimes her friends will have a blessingway as well as, or instead of a typical baby shower. With a blessingway the emphasis is moved from traditional gift giving to offering blessings for the baby and family. During a blessingway ceremony the woman's close female friends are asked to gather together to honor her and her baby. Guests are usually also asked to bring a few special items to "gift" to the mother. Some of these things might be a special bead, which would be strung along with everyone else's and made into a bracelet. One for mom and one for baby. Sometimes a seed is brought to represent something special, such as a quality the mother has or to tell a metaphorical story of strength. Seeds can say a lot! Also a special item to place on the blanket or alter. This item might represent the woman's own birth that was positive for her, or something special that gave them strength, a gift or a blessing for the baby, and last but not least food for the feast after the ceremony is also a welcome gift.

During the ceremony there are several important rituals observed. The first is to have every woman smudged with a combination of sage, sweet grass, cedar and tobacco, sometimes lavender is also used. This is a way of cleansing the energy and preparing the woman for the sacredness of the ceremony. At this time either the woman's mother, sister, closest friend, Midwife or Doula would place the pregnant woman in a soft chair or cushion and her hair is taken out and brushed lovingly. Her hair is then rearranged into a different style and perhaps flowers are added for beauty. This is to symbolize the change that she will be going through when she becomes a mother. Next her feet are washed in a bowl of water and lavender flowers and essential oils. This is to represent a washing away of all her fears. After the washing the feet are dried off and placed in a bowl of soft cornmeal, there is nothing more wonderful than to have your feet massaged by loving hands with cornmeal! This prepares her feet for the long journey ahead of her. During this time there is much singing and drumming by all of the woman gathered. Next, the pregnant woman might choose to have her belly painted or perhaps a henna design might be used instead, this is more permanent and can be a delightful reminder of the night! Sometimes a belly cast is made to preserve her pregnant form.

There are many other traditions that can be used, or perhaps you might want to make up your own. Belly dancing is a fun way to close the ceremony, or chanting to draw energy or closing it with something in the Goddess tradition is also wonderful. Either way a blessingway is truly a unique and spiritual way to honor mother and baby. After the ceremony sometimes dads, partners and kids would be invited to the feast. At this time blessings for baby can be offered by the men and children, they can be hung on a special tree or hung inside for the couple to remember the evening by.

 

My Story

If you are interested in reading more about blessingways, I have written
my story, and added photos of my blessingway as well as others I have been honored to help conduct.

 

 

Book:
MotherRising - The Blessingway Journey into Motherhood.

Full of straightforward information, detailed checklists, helpful tips, and practical advice, Mother Rising contains everything needed to successfully plan, organize, and lead a blessingway. But this is not simply a how-to book! Woven throughout the well-designed pages are thoughtful explorations of cultural habits and women's issues. While examining the loss of connection to meaningful traditions and lack of personal support systems, Mother Rising shows how the power created by women coming together will deepen friendships, build communities, feed spirits, and even revitalize our culture. MamaGoddessBirthShop.com is proud to carry this book and others on the subject of Blessingways, as well as offering beautiful Blessingway Kits.

Buy this beautiful Blessingway Kit...